WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO LEARN ABOUT TODDLERS?
In many families today, mothers and fathers both have jobs. There also are many single- parent families where a mother or father has to work outside the home. When parents are away from home, they need someone they can trust to take care of their toddlers. That someone might be you!
Taking care of someone’s child is an important job. If you know about toddlers, you will know how to take care of them. You will be prepared to do your best work. If you know how toddlers grow and develop, you will not expect a 2-year-old to speak in entire sentences or a 3-year-old to ride a bicycle. You will know what to do when a toddler says “no!” You will know what changes to expect the next time you are asked to be a caregiver.
WHO ARE TODDLERS?
Children from 18 months to 3 years are called toddlers. Two-and 3-year-olds are toddlers because they are learning to walk and tend to “toddle” about on unsteady legs. By the time children are 4 years old, they are past the toddler stage because they have learned to walk, run, climb, open, close, talk, and make friends. Toddlerhood is a stage of independence. Toddlers want to do everything for themselves. They experiment with their newly-learned skills and ideas by rebelling against caregiver’s wishes and by saying “no” so many times a day that they begin to sound like broken records!
Around 2 years, toddlers begin to understand language. Words and short sentences make an exciting new development in a toddler’s thinking. They learn to connect words with actions and objects and begin to communicate. “Go car,” “bad dog,” and “read book” all become familiar
sayings.
Toddlers grow physically and socially as their muscles develop and they learn muscle control. They use their eyes, hands, feet, and bodies together in constant motion. They climb, push, pull, and touch everything within reach. They kick, throw, dance, chase, and fall down. Feeling and tasting also become learning methods for toddlers and can be dangerous unless the house has been safety-proofed.
Socially, toddlers enjoy family members and other children, but may be afraid of strangers like new caregivers. Two- and 3-year-olds often develop fears of unfamiliar sights (men with beards, people who wear glasses) and sounds (the vacuum cleaner, thunderstorms). They may need lots of reassurance to calm down after they have been frightened.
Willy and Nicholas were active children. Willy liked to climb and Nicholas liked to open cupboard doors and pull everything out onto the floor. When Nicholas and Willy were together, they played next to each other, but not with each other. They said “no” and “mine” often and sometimes had temper tantrums.
Temper tantrums are normal for toddlers because they have not learned how to share. They often become upset when they cannot have things their own way. Their attention spans are short and they quickly lose interest in what they are doing. Here are more facts that you need to know about toddlers:
– physically
– intellectually – emotionally – socially
We can think of this development as a pie with four slices. If a toddler is missing a piece of pie, his or her development and growth will be incomplete.
There also is a fifth part of the toddler’s growth. That is their development of language. Learning to talk changes the world for toddlers. It gives them the ability to say what they like and do not like, what they want and do not want, and to talk about their emotions.
Learning to talk depends on the development of each slice of the pie. Toddlers have to have their throat, tongue, and mouth muscles developed enough to form words. They need to have gained the intellectual ability to recognize what words mean, and to remember when to use them. Through language, toddlers learn to control and sort out emotions and how to cooperate socially with playmates and people around them.
Toddlers grow as whole human beings. It is a mistake to focus on only one part of their growth. If you learn only about a toddler’s physical growth, you may believe that 2-year- olds are no different than 18-month-olds. Toddler’s abilities to run, talk, feel happy, and make friends increase side-by-side. As their muscles grow, so do their emotions. As their capacity to think and remember grows, so does their need for companionship and friendship.
The table in this section, shows how average toddlers grow and develop in each of these areas – 18 months through 3 years. Remember this is only a guide. Some toddlers speak in complete sentences when they are 3 years old, and others know only a few words. One 2-year-old might be frightened of strangers and others might welcome them with open arms.
Nicholas and Willy grew and developed at different rates. Willy rode a tricycle when she was 3 1/2. Nicholas was not sure he could ride his trike. He often said, “I can’t” and contented himself with pushing his trike in his yard. When Willy and Nicholas played together, things did not go well. Willy wanted to play with Nicholas’ toys, but Nicholas did not want to share. They would grab the same toy and both shout “Mine!” As they got older, Willy learned to share sooner than Nicholas and often let him have his way. Check the following chart [Table 1: How Babies Grow and Develop] and see other ways Nicholas and Willy might have developed differently.
How you can help
The main thing toddlers learn during their second and third years is independence. This means they learn to do things like climb, dress, walk, eat, and turn pages in books all by themselves. If you are taking care of toddlers, you can help them learn to be independent.
Willy and Nicholas have a quiz for you to see how much you have learned about toddlers and how you can encourage 2-and 3-year-olds to explore and learn.
TRUE OR FALSE – “Words aren’t important to me! I’ll get along just fine even if I don’t learn about language.”
The answer is FALSE. Everyone gets along better in the world once they have learned about language. Thinking in language is called “symbolic thought.” A symbol is something that stands for, or represents some other thing. For example, a siren causes us to pull over to the side of the road. The sound is a symbol. Words also are symbols. If you write or say “STAR,” you do not have to draw a * for others to know what you mean. Think of all the objects, actions, and emotions we can express quickly to each other because we share a symbolic language. Words are very important!
Here are some ways you can help toddlers learn about language.
Letting toddlers have the freedom to help in this way, though, is hard work for caregivers. Toddlers do not stay with one job for very long. Before you know it, they are on to another interesting activity. Toddlers move so fast it is hard for caregivers of any age to keep up with them. In fact, there have been experiments that show a professional athlete can not do exactly what a 2-year-old does throughout a day without reaching a state of total exhaustion.
Here are ways you can help the toddlers you care for stay physically occupied.
The answer is TRUE. Three-year-olds think and play differently than 2-year-olds. Two- year-olds are very active and physical. Three-year-olds slow down a little bit and advance toward imaginative play. Three-year-olds are more social than 2-year-olds, and they like to play with other children instead of just next to them. Sometimes they “make up” other children and think of these imaginary friends as special people in their lives.
Children develop social skills mainly through play. They learn how to share, cooperate, have conversations, and even how to meet people while they play. As a caregiver, just the right amount of play with toddlers (and their imaginary friends) can help stimulate their social development. Here are some simple “rules of play”:
As toddlers grow, they worry about being away from their parents. When they were infants, they forgot about people they could not see, but as toddlers, they remember them and know when they are not around. As a caregiver, you can help toddlers worry less about separating from their
parent(s). Two things will help:
They like to see what they can do with their hands and fingers, and what they can do with the object. Toddlers also are easily distracted. Have some play ideas prepared so you can keep the toddlers happy and occupied. Make or find a safe toy that will enable a toddler to do at least two of the following:
Here are two ideas for games you can make on your own:
FEELIE BOX: Select five or six pairs of objects: two small cars, two wooden blocks, two balls, two books, and two spoons. Lay one set of objects out on a table or the floor where the toddler can see them. Put the other set inside a box with a lid or in a bag. Ask the child to reach in without looking and to touch one of the articles. Then, ask the child (still without looking inside the box or bag) to pick the article on the table that matches the one in the box. (“Find one out here on the table that is just like the one you are feeling inside the box.”) After the child guesses, have him take the object out of the box. Once the child learns to play this game with the objects listed above, try a new set of objects that have different surfaces: two pieces of sandpaper, two pieces of cotton material, two pieces of wood, two smooth rocks, and two sponges. Play the game the same way. As the child takes things out of the box, talk about how some things are hard and others soft, some rough, others smooth, and so on.
MATCHING LOTTO: Get together several old magazines. If you have friends who have subscriptions to the same magazines, try to get two copies of each issue. Cut out the same picture from each of the identical issues. Paste these pictures on pieces of cardboard. Divide the picture boards into two sets. Put one picture on the table, and ask the child to find one from her pile that is just like yours. This is like playing dominoes.
Besides matching, you also can practice naming the objects on the cards that you are holding. Talk about what you do with a boat or an apple.
RESOURCES
There is a great deal of information available about toddlerhood. Check sources like public libraries, local book stores, special television and radio programs, magazines, parent groups or classes, doctors who specialize in caring for young children, and your local Cooperative Extension office.
COOPERATIVE EXTENSION
Order these through your local Cooperative Extension office.
Cornell University – *Terrific and Terrible Two-year-olds* by Jennifer Birckmayer and *Three and Four-year-olds* by Gretchen McCrod.
Iowa State University – *Family Daycare Exchange of Information and Ideas, Infants and Toddlers* by Dorothy Pinsky, Cooperative Extension specialist, human development and family life.
The *1-2-3 Grow!* series, issues 3 through 8, by Pauline Davey Zeece and Randy Weigel, Cooperative Extension specialists, human development and family life.
Oklahoma State University – *Agenda of Growth: Three to Four Years* by Elaine Wilson.
Pennsylvania State University – *Off to a Good Start* series by Program Director James E. Van Horn, Cooperative Extension family sociologist. Ask for special issues for 18 to 21 months and 24 months and beyond.
University of Arkansas – *Cradle Crier Months Twenty-two, Twenty-three, and Twenty- four* by Dr. Betty Youngman, Cooperative Extension family life specialist.
University of Hawaii – *The Child from 2-38 by Shirley S. Weeks, Cooperative Extension specialist, human development.
University of Wisconsin, Madison – *Early Childhood Exchange*, Winter 1982, Volume 5, Number 4 by Caroline Hoffman. (Ask for others aimed at toddler development.)
Washington State University, Pullman – *Infants, Toddlers, Runabouts: Five Lessons in Human Development*, $1.50.
OTHER RESOURCES
*Growing Child* – 22 N. Second Street, Lafayette, IN 47902. Subscription rate $15.95 yearly.
*Your Child From One to Six*, U.S. Children’s Bureau, Pamphlet No. 30, U.S. Government Printing Office, Washington, D.C. 20402. $5.00 each.
BOOKS
*A Sigh of Relief: The First Aid Handbook for Childhood Emergencies* by Martin Green. This book helps you begin safety training with toddlers.
*Learning Games for the First Three Years* by Joseph Sparling and Isabelle Lewis. Fully illustrated, 100 ideas for games with toddlers.
*Supertot* by Jean Marzollo. Creative learning activities for toddlers.
*What To Do When There’s Nothing To Do, A Mother’s Handbook*. Dell Books, 1967. 601 activities for toddlers. All materials suggested are household items.
TABLE 1: HOW TODDLERS GROW AND DEVELOP
Intellectual Shows curiosity. May say a few words. May put
18 MONTHS | |
Physical | Squats to pick up objects. Can pull or throw a toy. Walks without falling. Walks up stairs with hand held. Can kick , stack, and carry toys. |
Emotional | Hugs you and toys. Is impatient and frustrated when meeting difficulties. Cries when toys are taken away. |
Social Physical
two or three words together.
Plays alone. Recognizes other children. Tries to copy other children.
TWO YEARS OLD
Can kick. Stands on tiptoes. Jumps with both feet. Walks up and down stairs.
Intellectual | Refers to self by name. Begins to have imagination. Can scribble. Uses simple sentences. May begin to know short rhymes and songs. |
Emotional | Easily frustrated. Strives for independence; learns “NO”. Can be stubborn; needs rigid routines. |
Social | Joins in short songs, games, story time. Plays simple “pretend” games. Learning to share, but still not very cooperative. |
Physical
Runs easily. Feeds self. May ride tricycle and turn somersaults. Can cut with scissors.
Makes friends of similar ages. Likes to help. Show no preference for same sex friends.
Intellectual | Begins knowledge of simple concepts like: hello- goodbye. back-front, up-down. Recognizes letters and number, can count. Can use whole sentences. Creates imaginary friends and fantasies. |
Emotional | Begins to show emotion in more socially acceptable ways. Is more concerned with pleasing people. |
Social